GYM
Last night I had possibly the most embarrassing experience of my life! I'd gone to the gym for a Saturday evening workout at Virgin. I'd run a nice fast 5K in under 26 minutes and so headed back to my locker to get showered and changed before the gym shut at 9pm. I'm not sure how I managed it, but I accidentally changed the combination on my padlock after throwing my dirty clothes and for some reason my towel into the locker. I guess I must have been tired as I was left outside my locker, unable to open it with nothing but my glasses, a bottle of shampoo and for some reason my phone! The gym was due to shut in 15 minutes and so I was stood contemplating whether it was possible to wrench off the locker door whilst naked to get to my clothes and towel or having to speak to someone whilst wearing absolutely no clothes and ask for their help!
There was only one other lady in the changing room, so naked I walked over and asked if I could perhaps borrow a towel and ask for someone to help. I was so grateful that instead this lovely lady went out to the gym floor in her towel to get someone to chop off my padlock before the gym closed! Never had to ask a stranger for a favour before whilst being completely stark naked! Whilst waiting for the bolt cutters, I did manage to pull out my towel that was poking out the bottom of the locker so my dignity was somewhat preserved when the lady chopped off my padlock. (Strangely she did declare that the exact same thing had happened to her...)
TRAIN
Back in January 2010 I had taken the train from Leeds to York to visit a client for work. It was very snowy and so some of the trains to get back from York to Leeds were slightly delayed. I looked for the next train back on the boards and it stated that it was the delayed London Kings Cross Train calling at Leeds departing from platform 3. I walked over to platform 3 and the train to Kings Cross pulled up and I got on and sat down.
The nasal announcement came over the speaker as the train pulled out of the station "Welcome to passengers joining us at York this is the Grand Central train to London Kings Cross calling at London Kings Cross" it was a couple of seconds before the reality set in - I had got on a non stop train to London! I managed to find a very helpful lady who wasn't a guard, but found one for me although disappointingly told me "It's like a flight, once it's started we can't stop" (I did debate for about 10 minutes timing pulling the emergency chord to stop near a station - £500 might have just felt worth it!) The guard was very helpful and said that if I stayed with him when the train reached Kings Cross he'd make sure I could get back on the return train and wouldn't charge me for a ticket (which could have been over £100!) Fortunately I had my phone and this to read and keep me entertained (whilst being very angry and irritated at myself and the situation)
I eventually got back into Leeds at 7.30pm - it had taken me over 6 hours to do a 25 minute train journey!
BLACK EYE
So this is from ages ago, I was in Turkey on holiday with my friend Philippa back in August 2000 and I was completely sober on what had been quite a boozy holiday. I'd just got out of the shower and managed to somehow turn around to pick something off the floor and walk into a wall. I gave myself a very black eye which went from blue, to purple to yellow across the course of a week. During the day it was easy to hid behind sun glasses, but when it was the evening, I had to put masses amounts of eye-shadow over it to cover it up - I looked very strange.
CAMP-FIRE
When I was 17 I was in Venture Scouts with a lot of my friends. We'd gone camping one weekend and it was cold so a camp-fire was a necessity. We were packing up to go home and needed to put out the fire. I'd used up all the water and the water tap was a fair distance away so I decided to stamp out the embers with my walking boots - forgetting that we had burnt a number of items including pallets and chairs! A sharp sting went through my foot and I realised I'd stood on a nail! I sat down and proceeded to remove the nail with my hands, burning my fingers on the hot metal in the process. My friends had realised what was going on at this point and got me some water to cool down the burns. The huge hole in my foot had been cauterised so wasn't bleeding, but it had damaged some of my nerves so I couldn't walk on it. My ingenious friends put me in a wheelbarrow, wheeled me to the car park and then eventually took me to A&E. My two memories of A&E are being given crutches to help me walk around (harder than it looks) and a chav couple, the girl wandering over to me asking if I could help her find her horribly long fake blue and yellow painted finger nail. Morale of the story - don't stamp out fires with walking boots if you have been burning anything with nails in! It still feels weird to this day when I poke the scar.
CLUMSY GENES
I think that my inherent clumsiness comes from my Dad. I have many examples, but probably my favourite is when he was helping me move into our new house and he was putting some folded up boxes behind one of these chairs (Picture isn't mine, but this type of chair):
My Mum heard a crash and went to investigate and all she could see was him face down behind the chair with his legs straight up in the air! I have no idea how he managed it.
As my husband says to me every time I do a "clumsy" "It's like Keith Rider is in the room!"
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