New York Marathon - Marathon Number 11 and how not to run or train for a marathon!

In a fit of pique in January when Alan realised that he had a fair few air miles from his credit card (definitely recommend a reward or cashback credit card if you end up putting a lot on for work that you claim back!) he asked if I fancied going to New York again.  I'd been twice before and both times loved it and so was up for the idea, he then did some research and found that Sports Tour International offer guaranteed marathon places with a combined holiday package and asked if I fancied it - and so feeling positive about my running in the midst of Red January I said yes!

Now first things first, it's not a cheap marathon to run or enter.  I think that the ballot places are most likely as tough to get into as London and if you want to run as a group of friends/couple the likelihood of everyone getting a ballot place is probably very limited and I believe it still costs $358 per place if you are a non US resident.

If you are speedy you could try and run a qualifying time which is even tighter than London as for the 2020 race you would need to be nailing the following times, broken down by age group: 18 to 34 years old (3:00 for men, 3:30 for women) 35 to 39 (3:05 for men, 3:35 for women (I'm sure you still have to pay those chunky entry fees!).

You can also try and secure a place by running a "virtual" marathon between the 31st October and 3rd November.... although this has already happened for 2020 - but more information is here - again I'm guessing you'll still have to pay, although the fees listed for charity places seem to be around $150 and I think that is for US charities only and with fundraising targets of c$2650.  I've tried to see what the fundraising targets might be for UK charities, but it seems as though you have to apply and will still need to pay for your flights, accommodation and the $358 fee.

So the costs are a bit prohibitive, but the good news is that you get all of this stuff included in your fee:

• Entry to the 2020 TCS New York City Marathon, including fluid/fueling stations, medical support, entertainment, bag-check handling, and security 
• Official New Balance technical shirt 
• Official transportation to the start from Midtown Manhattan, Lower Manhattan, or the Meadowlands Sports Complex (New Jersey) - Start area, including breakfast and entertainment 
• Finisher materials: medal, food, beverages, and United Airlines/Foot Locker Heatsheet™ 

However...it's worth nothing that:

• The drawing is free to enter and limited to one entry per person
• Entry fees are charged upon acceptance. 
• Once an entrant is accepted, the entry fee is nontransferable under any and all circumstances, and is also nonrefundable under any and all circumstances except in the event of cancellation of the marathon.

There are a few other ways to enter, but most likely out of reach for a few of us, but if you are interested and a budding elite athlete or philanthropist, here are some ideas.

Accommodation in New York is also not cheap, Sports Tours sell packages that include guaranteed entry plus accommodation, flights, transfers and other extras or a combination of your choosing.  Alan being a frugal (definitely not stereotypical Yorkshireman(!!)) knew that the air miles sorted our flights (although we paid the usual air taxes) and we went for the guaranteed entry and minimum accommodation option of 3 nights to save money.  We then used Hotwire to book a cheaper (and better quality) hotel for our last 2 nights.  Hotwire is great if you are a bit relaxed about exactly what hotel you get - it allows you to stipulate an area and price range for your chosen dates and tells you what you might get and then you book blind and find out where you end up after you've paid.  It's always worked really well for us previously (we didn't end up in the Trump hotel - phew no ethical conflict!).  This time it took us to Hyatt House in Midtown/Chelsea area - only a few blocks from most of the places you'd want walk to in NYC, very roomy and a really friendly welcome.

New York Marathon was something Alan and myself both hoped to look forward to and train well for.  The reality was that life got in the way a bit; things like getting engaged in April and married in September, Alan having a slipped disc injury flare up after London Marathon and not running more than Liverpool Half in May, me studying for and completing my CIRF course in September, both of us being a lot heavier than when we were at our running peaks back in 2016, me currently trying to be more than one person at work as well as my own on/off niggly injuries,  This all meant as the weeks passed I was starting to dread the marathon I should be really excited about.

We'd clearly invested a lot of money in our trip and 4 days before race day (having only run 8 miles the Sunday before and the furthest before then being the Leeds Country Way (11.5 miles) on 1st September) I was really ill with a heavy cold/flu and I ended up working from home (not something I tend to do!). I was really worried as to whether I could make it around.

Alan and I had discussed our game plan for the marathon and as a qualified Coach in Running Fitness I would always recommend training appropriately for a marathon as it is a distance not to be trifled with!  So none of the below is what I would actually coach.

However, with money invested and a non transferable place, we decided to research how long was available to complete the course and make it a true sightseeing trip of NYC.  They have 4 waves and 3 different starts, somehow I'd ended up in Wave 3 and Alan in Wave 2.  We checked and he was able to start further back in my wave.  The sweep vehicle is 6 hours and 30, but unlike London starts at the end of the starting pack - so being in Wave 3 would mean we had more like 7 - 7 hours 30 until we were swept up.  They also keep the finishing line open until 7.25 pm.  This was my 11th marathon and Alan's 8th and I wouldn't recommend taking on a marathon as we did without the training, but we have the benefit of knowing what the demands of this distance are on our bodies and how to mitigate for this we knew we'd likely complete it, even if it was slow.  We figured that we could walk run c9mins 15 secs KM and get around in sub 6.5 hours and so that was the plan.

We flew out from Manchester with Virgin at 12.30pm on the Thursday and Alan had strategically booked seats that allowed for him to comfortably stretch his legs and didn't have to pay extra to do so.  For the week between our clocks going back and the Sunday of the marathon, NYC is only 4 hours behind UK time, so we arrived at a reasonable time.  We made our way through crowded transport with the Air Train and then the subway to the Port Authority and we walked a few minutes to the Sports Tours International Hotel which was Double Tree by Hilton New York Times Square West.  It was a good location to get to the Expo the following morning - around 15 minutes walk and also to the transfer buses on the morning of the marathon - around 15 minutes walk as well.  The room was small, but functional and my only issue was that the shower seal was not present so the room flooded when you showered - Alan was also sad there wasn't a bath!  Our first evening was a bit functional as I was still really poorly and so we grabbed a Five Guys for tea after checking into our room and got an early night.

The following day we went along to the Expo to pick up our race numbers and marathon t-shirts which were great - long sleeved and technical.  Only slight niggle was I had to get an XXL as they'd run out of L and XL and M was a bit of a suffocating fit!  However it looks great and I will definitely wear it often (first outing was to parkrun this morning!).

Speaking of parkrun - there is one in New Jersey - Delaware and Raritan Canal, you can get a train and an uber, or there was a bus arranged via Facebook...needless to say we didn't partake as it wouldn't have been sensible prep for either of us in these circumstances - they did have a record turnout of 111 as a result of the marathon.  There is also an optional 5K Abbott race that gives you a great hat souvenir and is "race to the finish" for the last 5K of the marathon I believe - again not good prep for us so we gave it a miss.

 

The Expo was fun, and despite feeling gross I managed to enjoy picking up free samples of compeed (Just as we were saying damn...we forgot the compeed!) and we bought some cool looking, roomy and comfortable NYC Marathon branded running belts for $23 each.  I also realised I'd totally forgotten my running nutrition, but fortunately managed to find the same Shot Bloks as I use in the UK, but with exciting new flavours like Margarita with 3 x extra sodium - useful when you sweat a lot!

We grabbed a self serve deli salad for lunch (they do it by weight rather than what you can cram into a container so it was a rather expensive, but delicious lunch!).  And after a bit more exploring we went back to the hotel so I could rest and Alan went to get breakfast for the following morning and picked up bananas, croissants and belvita.  We somehow managed to find a table that evening at an Italian restaurant - Il Punto and filled up on pasta.

That night the clocks went back and fortunately we had an early night as we were still jet lagged and so the obscenely early start of 4.30am to get the 5.30am transfer bus meant we still had around 6 hours sleep.  Classically I had the anxiety sleep I get pre-marathon and kept waking up, panicking about everything - again not what I recommend as a coach.  Eliud Kipchoge reportedly gets a religious 8 hours per night plus a 2 hour nap during the day!

We'd laid out our kit the night before and so we got ready quickly with each of us putting on a throw away t-shirt on and walked down to reception where the Sports Tours International rep met us and at 5.10am walked us down to the bus stop where the marshalls were super enthusiastic even at that eye-wateringly early time!

The bus takes you across to Staten Island and took around 45 minutes as we watched the sun slowly rises over NYC.  The weather was perfect running weather - completely dry, clear sky, but pretty chilly as a result!  We got off the bus and walked through to the security gates - it's a sad fact that you have to be scanned for weapons and bombs and aren't even allowed to wear large fancy dress costumes or camel bak style water packs.  

We then were in the race start village which was great!  We had complimentary coffees, bagels, Gatorade  and water as well as picking up Dunkin Donut hats (brilliant marketing on their part!).  There were also Honey Stinger waffles and bananas available.  We found a spot to sit down at around 6.15am and then had over 4 hours to wait until my 10.35am start wave!  It was a great atmosphere, everyone was in good spirits, but it was FREEZING!  We'd fortunately picked up rain ponchos and so we huddled together and tried to keep warm, but if there is one piece of advice I can give for race day it's please take extra layers and even old blankets to use and then donate to the goodwill bins (which I thought were excellent ideas!).  

About an hour and a half before the start we wandered down towards the blue start village area and I had a quick glance in the Therapy Dog tent (if I wasn't so cold I'd have been tempted to sneak in for a stroke!)  I needed the toilet again (they were plentiful and with not many queues) and as I walked back, I spotted a full goodwill bin and so "borrowed" a blanket for the last hour of our wait to share with Alan (we returned it to the bin after we'd finished with it).

I realised as we were waiting that my hair band had fallen off... I tried tying my hair up with string from the start village bag, but it wasn't great.  At least my buff would keep most of my flyaway thin hair away from my face I hoped. 

We queued up for our wave having heard the cannon fire for all the previous waves!  When you sign up you can either choose a bag drop (as you get at London Marathon etc) or a post race Poncho - we went for the poncho which meant that we didn't have to drop a bag off with the UPS trucks.

We were in our wave, it was all becoming real and we were about to take on 26.2 miles.  The sun was shining, the atmosphere was buzzing and we started to walk towards the bridge for our start.  As we walked over the bridge I noticed there were lots of clothes thrown on the floor (no goodwill bins on the bridge as per all the regular tannoy announcements!) and I said to Alan "I wish there was a spare hairband" and 2 steps later there was one there so I was able to discard the ineffective string and properly tie my hair back!  I then said "I wish I could find £1m" sadly this wish wasn't granted...should have gone with that first?

We were started with a cannon, ticker tape and the sound track of "New York New York" and even though there are 2 starts as per London Marathon, there are more runners (53000) it somehow felt more intimate as a start rather than being moved like cattle over the start line.  

The first 2 miles is just running over the Staten Island Bridge, loads of people stopped for selfies on the bridge, but we cracked on with our slow running plan and cleared the bridge in a solid time of just over 20 minutes.  The bridge workers were super excited to cheer all the runners on!

We then got onto Brooklyn and that's when the support really kicked off!  It's a hard to describe the dichotomy that New York Marathon was both more and less serious than London Marathon and other UK races.  More serious - very few fancy dress costumes at all, no club runners generally, but everyone mostly in serious running gear and certainly walking around NYC before and after lots of very obvious "runners" or as Alan sometimes referred to them "running w**nkers" i.e. always in running gear, wearing their medal for 3 days after the race even in the airport with a hint of arrogance about them.  Less serious - overly enthusiastic supporters who literally screamed with excitement, even by the time we reached some of them after 4 plus hours, people with great sense of humour on banners like at mile 10 "you're nearly there - Fake News! and printing out huge personal pictures of runners faces and even their pet cats and dogs.  NB. I'm definitely printing out massive Maya and Qubit faces for the next race I have to support Alan for!

Brooklyn I think was my favourite in terms of support - it was the longest section and had full on marching bands, rappers and rock bands - we loved it!   Alan kept a close eye on his heart rate and we adapted our pace to make sure we didn't peak his heart rate and so ran walked and got fairly quickly to around 10 miles and I figured as we had the opportunity to do so I'd use the walking sections to share some of the atmosphere, sights and sounds of the marathon on facebook live.  I'd intended to use it as a distraction to Alan from his sore back, but I'm not sure he altogether appreciated it!  The first time I'd taken my phone out I started jogging and ended up throwing shot bloks everywhere!  

The water and Gatorade stations are pretty frequent (every mile?) after the first 3 miles (none on the Staten Island bridge) and they all had paper cups which I think I preferred as it felt potentially less environmentally harmful that plastic bottles and was certainly much less of a trip hazard.  I tend to not recommend using anything on race day that you haven't had in training and Gatorade isn't something I've had much of before, but it worked well for me on the day.  There are also toilets every mile and fortunately we only needed to stop once.  The best thing is that there are formally arranged and informally arranged music stations around 3 per mile!  I had quite a few dances as we were running along and we clapped every single band and singer regardless of talent!

I like to count down all long distance races in miles, kilometres and parkruns to mean that I'm ticking something off every few minutes.  As a distraction (annoyance?) technique with Alan we nominate parkruns for each 5K segment of the race and always finish on Woodhouse Moor of course!  We ticked over the halfway point and then soon reached Queensborough Bridge which is 16 miles in and even though the bridge itself wasn't the most scenic there were some great views across to Manhattan Island as we trudged over onto Manhattan and up into Harlem before heading into the Bronx and then back into Manhattan for the iconic finish in Central Park.

       

I had hoped that by not spiking my heart rate and run walking it would mean my legs didn't get that 20 mile ache where every step hurts a bit.  Neither of us hit the wall as a result of the slower place which was great and actually we could have taken advantage of the 20 mile Biofreeze station, but the end was in sight so we kept going.  We continued with our Facebook live breaks which I certainly enjoyed and it was nice to get support from our friends back home whilst we were running!

 

The last couple of miles you can count down the blocks until you hit Central Park and the support continues to be great - I really enjoyed a brass band just before we hit Manhattan again coming out of Harlem.  Once you hit Central Park it feels like the end is in reach, but there is still a good nearly 2 miles to count down (amazingly our Garmins were fairly accurate despite all the huge buildings that usually skew GPS).  There was an incentive to run the last mile the fastest - we tried, but Alan's back by this point was incredibly sore so we had to walk a bit, although we did manage to run over the finish line!  

As we crossed the finish in 5 hours 51 minutes (my second slowest ever time next to Medoc - the wine marathon!) we held hands and it was an amazing atmosphere.  We then walked down to pick up first a heat sheet (necessary as it's a 30 minute walk to get your poncho or bag), then the great big apple medal, then a very good quality (and reusable!) goody bag which included water, an apple, pretzels, more Gatorade, protein shake, Honey Stinger waffle, biofreeze and I think some other things!

We walked down to our poncho collection point and they were fleece lined, waterproof and felt like a hug!  It was funny watching all the runners dressed in them as we walked out of the marathon area.  Fortunately we had no need for the reunion point as we ran together, but like all big races phone signal is patchy, so definitely worth pre-arranging a meeting point if you need one.  We staggered a bit confused to the subway and managed to get on a train back - it was only 20 minutes walk, but we'd done just enough thanks.  The trains were rammed and one lady even passed out and had to get off the train early - she seemed ok thankfully.

After a shower and change of clothes we had just enough time to walk down to the pre-booked post race celebration party (kindly only 5 blocks away from the hotel) for £20 we got 2 cocktails and canapes which included tasty mini slider burgers and meant we didn't need to buy dinner.  We chatted to one of the reps who was lovely (I feel this may be my future "retirement" job!) and after the food was done and we'd had a final JD and ginger to celebrate we walked back to the hotel stopping off at Shake Shack for a celebration Salted Caramel milkshake and then went straight to bed clocking up 66267 steps for the day!

All in all, whilst it was nearly a personal worst for me in terms of time, it was definitely a personal best in terms of experience and atmosphere.  It was lovely to "run" a whole marathon with Alan and cross the finish together and not once did we argue about stopping or pace.  The views were incredible and the organisation was great!  I said as we set off and as we shivered in the start village "I definitely won't want to do this again"...but I might have changed my mind...

PS. if you want to do NYC 2020 it's their 50th anniversary and I think the day before Trump is either re-elected or knocked out of the Whitehouse - could be an interesting time to visit!

Reflections on managing mental health when injured when your main therapy is running!

I started writing a blog post about breaking my shoulder in March and the impact on my mental health, but it's evolved into 2 posts and here is the first, but probably second as it's reflecting on how the injury has impacted my life.

Reflecting on the impact of this injury on last year has allowed me to have some fairly large realisations on my personality and how certain traits feed into my mental health.

In early 2017 I had some CBT therapy that helped me to realise that I have low self esteem.  If you know me, even quite well, that might not be very evident as my low self esteem through my school years, university and into adult life has generally represented itself as competitiveness which to the outside observer would generally appear fairly successful and well adapted behaviour.  

At school I worked extremely hard and at one point our class was told to "stop doing extra homework!" Yes I really was that geeky! I got a good bunch of GCSEs and A-Levels, but I remember looking at the results table for my school and endlessly comparing what I had achieved to everyone else.  By doing this I was trying to tell myself - I'm better than x in my class, so I'm an ok person.  In year 10 I was in the top set for Maths and was at the bottom of the class, my teacher compared my grades to the set below and suggested I might be better suited to moving down, but my best friend was in the top set with me and so I took the opportunity to complete a maths text book on quadratic equations over the summer holidays and happily achieved an A grade.  If I had moved down then it would confirm my fears that I was actually as stupid as I feared.  

After graduating I then started a job in recruitment.  Initially I liked the idea of helping people find jobs as a career and hadn't necessarily appreciated as a more naive graduate that actually it often boils down to a sales job (although you do genuinely get a buzz from getting someone a life changing better job!).  This allowed me another method of validation - if I bill more fees than x colleague, I'm better than them, I'm a worthy person, I hopefully won't get fired (read up on imposter syndrome for more about this fear!)  If I look at my work performances over the past 17 years, frequently my better months/quarters/years correlate very neatly with my poorest points of mental health.

In 2004 at probably my lowest ever point of mental health, I signed up to run a 5K Race for Life for my Aunty Mary who had breast cancer and thankfully then discovered how running and exercise can positively impact mental health.  It is however very easy to fall into the same trap with the amount of easily available race statistics and how you can literally overtake people and say in a race "I'm better than that person I just overtook, so I'm worth something"

I was really worried that with my shoulder I would not be able to run and also would lose an avenue of "validation" as my times got slower.  In reality it's given me a different perspective.

When I was worried I couldn't do something I loved like running for a really long time and I eventually got the chance to run again, I realised that there is something really nice about just being able to run.  To be able to smell the fresh air, feel sun, rain and wind on your face and see some of the beautiful views you only get to see when your own 2 feet take you there.  The opportunity to run with Alan and chat without distractions and run with friends and meet new people.  The opportunity to lead running groups and help others to find the benefits and joy of running.  

It made me realise that gratitude for just being able to run is more important than being uber competitive about your parkrun time and as my Facebook is full of runners, it also made me realise that humility in your own running ability is something to aspire to.  It's great to celebrate success and achievement, but it's worth appreciating that someone getting out of bed when they felt barely able to do so and running a parkrun is probably more of a personal achievement than shaving 2 seconds off your best time.  It's always worth remembering you don't know what is going on in someone's mind and in their life or in their body for that matter.

We live in a world now of constant and inescapable comparison with others.  Thankfully when I was at school I only had 149 others in my year to compare myself against, but now thanks to Instagram, Facebook and Social Media we are bombarded with images of people better looking than us, achieving bigger and better things than us and probably running longer and faster than us.  Does that mean that we are any less as people than before social media?  It really doesn't and the one thing that I have come to value more than anything this year never really makes it onto social media for comparison and that is kindness.

Kindness from those close to me like Alan helping me get dressed and cooking whilst I was one armed, kindness from my friends and family like Jenny taking me home from the hospital for my operation (and lots of offers from friends to do the same) and even from strangers like the lady who picked me up when I was struggling to catch the train and dropped me off at the station.

I'm still competitive, i'll still try and overtake that last person at the finish and beat my best time (now I measure my times in the context of post shoulder injury), but I also run each time appreciating that I don't know what the future holds and to run each run as if it was my last and make it one to remember as I'll always want to remember the joy that just being able to run can give and you'll never know what life might throw at you that might just get in the way of the small things that you never realised gave you so much joy.

An Anxious Extrovert and running...

I injured my hamstring in a stupid drunken dancing competition at our work Christmas party on the 14th December last year.  Since then I've gone from a form where I managed to PB every distance I've ever run in 2016 (1 mile, 5K, 10K, 10 mile, Half Marathon and Marathon) to my first run back being an incredibly painful and slow flat parkrun at Pontefract that took me more than 10 minutes slower than my usual times.  It was my fault and I've certainly paid the price for being a bit tipsy and over exuberant.

I'm incredibly competitive in pretty much everything I do and I am generally rushing around getting things done, so to have to slow down and recover has been tough for me both physically and mentally.  (I make it sound like it was worse than it was - I was limping for a fair few weeks and had to ice it for the first few days.)  I'm pleased to say that after a fair few physio sessions, lots of leg exercises (could do more), encouragement from Alan, Hyde Park Harriers and lots of other friends and family I haven't gone completely mad and I'm managing to chip in reasonable (if still painful) running performances again.

So what has any of this got to do with being an Anxious Extrovert?

After coming off being on antidepressants for 12 years in June 2013 running has been my therapy.  It's not the only thing that keeps me with a good state of mental health, but I know that in no particular order I have to concentrate on the following things to make sure I keep healthy:

• Regular exercise where I sweat for at least 20 minutes for around 3 - 6 times a week
• Regular contact with loved ones, friends, family
• Reasonable sleep - i.e. at least 6 hours a night
• Eating well - balanced meals with fresh fruit and veg
• Not overdosing on caffeine or alcohol - small amounts are fine
• Getting time outside in the fresh air
• Yoga and or some sort of meditation/mindfulness at least once a week
• Having Willow (and all my other lovely pets before her)
• Keeping some sort of journal from time to time
• Not letting work take up too much of my time
• Doing something a bit creative from time to time

It's quite a long list, but I find if I miss out bits of it for too long, my mood dips considerably. I used to think that it would be easy to tell if my mood was "dipping", but sometimes it creeps up on me, I'll find myself in the middle of a task staring off into space, or leaping from one task to another to another and another...achieving nothing in the space of a few hours.   I'm fairly well practiced in making sure I stay on top of depression as I've described above, but what I'd not appreciated was a "side effect" of long term anti-depressant use was that it meant for around 12 years I never really had to process or learn to deal with anxiety.

After a few obvious triggers of life changing events like moving house coupled with the reduction in running, I found myself at the start of the year experiencing high levels of anxiety and being a bit at a loss of how to make them reduce.  

I've recently seen a few posts on Facebook explaining what anxiety feels like to different people and I've got my own examples here are a few.

• I bumped shoulders with a colleague in the kitchen at work about 6 months ago when I was half asleep, I still feel bad about it and think about it now.
• As I'm falling asleep my body twitches me awake again - like those dreams you have when you are falling and it wakes you up.
• I think about a scenario I'm a little worried about, and it whirs around and around in my head getting worse and more catastrophic the more it spins - which can be as small as trying to decide what to pack for a day at the beach.

Usually a good dose of running and keeping busy has been enough to stave off depression and anxiety, but without being able to run as much as I usually have done it's been a bit harder to shake.

So let's get to explaining my Anxious Extrovert phrase.  Some of you might have heard of Myers Briggs and about 4 years ago I had my personality type outlined with this as an ENFP (I could bang on about how much I love Myers Briggs, but I'll maybe save that for another time) The "E" is extroversion - it was my strongest preference and you can see by how much in this picture below.

The "E" doesn't mean that someone is the most obviously loud confident type of person that we often associate the word "Extrovert" to mean, but more that it is their preferred style of how they get "energy" from the world - i.e. if they are tired will they push through and go to that party to see their friends or will they go home and watch Netflix alone under a blanket?  

One of the things that I've noticed recently is that I've not been as socially active as usual and it's not that I've not wanted to be, more that I've perhaps allowed the anxiety to rule me a bit too much and not pushed forward with arranging social things as frequently.  I'm extremely grateful that I've got things like parkrun, run club, Guides and other good friends who will continue to help me create a structure in my life that forces me to not retreat too far and let anxiety win.  If I turn down too many social invitations, then I won't get invited and then I get less energy from the people around me - I want to break that cycle before it starts up!

I guess the challenge I'm finding is that on the surface I will look and behave as "normal", but inside my head I'm wasting precious brain power on the incessant whirring of thoughts.  

For me, one of the best things about running is that you are forced to be at least a bit "mindful" and present in the moment and it means that annoying whirring part of your brain has to get shoved to the back of your head for a while to allow you to focus on your run.  I find this to be especially true of a trail race such as yesterday at Guiseley Gallop; you have to look down at the ground at the tree roots and rocks and plan ahead where you are going to put your feet to avoid a taking a tumble.  

During the race yesterday I managed to not only stay on my feet (I'm well known for my clumsy running incidents), but also had the chance during the 10K of trail to process a few thoughts including my conclusion that I'm currently an Anxious Extrovert and also that one of my biggest discoveries when I had my Myers Briggs done was that - Not everyone sees the world in the same way as I do.  This was a revelation for me at the time and as basic as it seems I still need to remind myself that just because I make a conclusion or an inference of a situation, the reality and perception could be completely different to someone else.  Maybe the fact I've not been as sociable will lead people to think I'm generally being rude, or maybe they've not even noticed (there's that anxiety again), but what about if I tell them?  Then at least they might have an idea of what's going on.  Maybe they have similar challenges, but don't want to say anything?  Mental health issues still have that "stigma" of weakness attached to them.  I might not see the world the same as everyone, but maybe someone else is struggling with anxiety or depression and hasn't tried running or exercise?  

I'm fortunate to have discovered parkrun, Hyde Park Harriers as well as other important running friends (yes Alan!) that give my weeks a rhythm and routine of exercise (injuries permitting) and I'm really pleased that movements like #runandtalk are there and hopefully will help people find other ways to manage their mental health successfully.

Virgin London Marathon 2015 - The PB to beat all PBs!

Again a bit of a gap on this blog as life takes over, but I like to try and pick things up again if I'm feeling especially inspired and what about another marathon for inspiration?

I last wrote about running back in April last year when I took on my first London Marathon and whilst it was an amazing experience and my training had gone pretty well, I was a little bit disappointed with my time on a flat course being 4 minutes slower than my previous PB on the hilly Eden Project Marathon back in 2011.

This was a bit of an "accidental" marathon as I wasn't sure I wanted to do another one as my training was tough and time consuming last year and around mile 17-18 I said to myself "never again!"  Then as I ran through the finish line feeling massively emotional I thought..."just put in for the ballot again, you probably won't get in" and then before I knew what was happening in October I received the "Congratulations you're in" magazine.  

Around the same time my Grandad sadly passed away - 33 hours before he turned 100.  I was always both inspired and in awe of my Grandad.  He was an ex RAF Squadron leader, retrained as a teacher when he left the forces, had 5 children (my Dad is the oldest), was always active and fit making me and my brother run for buses when he was taking us swimming.  My memories of him are of him with his Chinese friends (He decided to learn Mandarin Chinese in his 70s!) and being the man he was, didn't just sit in a classroom - no he decided to pretty much befriend the entire Chinese community of Birmingham. In fact one year he invited them to a bonfire party and about 100 people turned up (the carpet in the lounge was threadbare and needed replacing afterwards!).  He also taught "old" ladies to swim and swam twice a week until his mid 90s.  I found out during the eulogy that his philosophy to a long and happy life was simple "Find Love, keep active and keep your mind active.  I am a little short on the first and last one, but it seemed like a fitting tribute to be able to run my next marathon in celebration of such a wonderful man and to raise funds for his chosen charity SSAFA.

This is not the most recent photo of my Grandad, but sadly Alzheimers meant that this is probably one of the last times I remember him being "my Grandad" back when I got married in May 2008 when he was 93.  A lot has changed for me since then - I've run 5 marathons, had a lot of interesting positive and negative life events and am no longer married.  It's been a challenging few years and I have to say that running has probably been the best "therapy" I could ask for and has kept me sane even through the tough times.

So at the start of the year my marathon track record was as follows:

2010 - Edinburgh - 4hrs 54 mins 32 secs 

2011 - Brathay - 4 hrs 57 mins 9 secs 

2011 - Eden Project - 4 hrs 47 mins 51 secs 

2014 - London - 4 hrs 51 mins 12 secs

Once again I decided to use the Lucozade Sport training plan as it worked really well last year and so I started off in earnest in January with my first 15 minute run on the plan.  Unbelievably I've not been ill or on a significant "holiday" so I've managed to complete every single run on the plan - with a bit of jigging around of days.  I've also combined this with 1 - 2 sessions of Yoga each week and strength training sessions.  One of the biggest boosts was that my BFF (yes we have named it so!) Jenny Cantrell offered to train me as her "guinea pig" whilst she was re-training to be a personal trainer.  Jenny devised me a marathon training plan combined with a weight loss plan which set sensible and achievable goals - I think I was extra motivated too as I wanted to do well for her!

Since January I've lost in the region of 7kg and it's meant that I can run a lot faster!  In fact I knocked 15 minutes of my half marathon PB in March at Kingston Half Marathon with 1 hr 53 mins and 28 secs on top of a PB a couple of weeks earlier at Bath Half which was 1 hr 57 mins and 41 secs.  

I've also joined a running club - after running for 11 years it's crazy I've not done it before, especially after I was mugged in September 2013 which meant I hated being outside by myself and a lot of my training for the marathon last year was completed on a dull treadmill at the gym.  I had previously compensated for this by doing lots of park runs and races within the Leeds Race Series - basically I went to races to run "with" people.  My biggest issue with joining a club has always been time as I work long hours and already have most Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays tied up with other commitments.  I took the plunge after catching up with a chap called James I knew through work at an NHS conference who invited me to try running at Hyde Park Harriers.  This fits in really well for me as they meet at 7pm in Leeds City Centre on Tuesdays.   It's been great - running and chatting and meeting new people whilst fitting in my training and enjoying the fresh air!  I've met lots of friendly people and heard some inspiring stories as well - I've even got a proper club running vest now!

So marathon weekend began with a mere 5 hour drive down from Leeds to my parents accompanied by Marla my cat who is a bit poorly at the moment.  I set off fairly early, as I only had until 5pm to get to Exel in London to pick up my race pack.  I get why they do this as they want you to walk through the Marathon Expo, but it's a bit of a faff really if you are coming from a long distance away.  I arrived at my parents just before 1pm, got Marla settled in and my Dad dropped me off at the station to head into London.  

I was exhausted on the way back and that morning I'd realised that one of my toes on my left foot was pretty sore - one of the nails had started to fall off (grim I know!) and I knew that if I tried to run 26.2 miles as it was it was going to be agony by the end.  I popped into Boots and bought a special bandage thing to pop over it and got the train home.  Walking back from the station I felt like I was going to fall asleep - I'm not quite sure why I was so tired, but I got home and ended up having a 3 hour nap!  My Mum made me amazing aubergine stew and pasta for dinner and I got everything ready with my race kit, choosing my final race outfit, writing my details on the back of my race number and getting my post race bag sorted with what I would need after completing the marathon.  I got into bed as early as I could around 10pm and probably got to sleep about 11pm waking up about twice in the night with odd dreams - probably far too excited!

I woke up about on time and ran around in my usual panic getting ready, eating porridge with pineapple, putting on compeed plasters and my toe bandage and copious amounts of vaseline. I had decided to wear my SSAFA charity vest and had ironed on my name from when I'd run the Bath Half, but as the letters were falling off I also wrote it in pen - sad I know, but I need the boost sometimes of getting cheered on!  My Dad dropped me off at the train station and I took the train to Waterloo.  Gradually people with the red marathon drawstring bags joined the train and we smiled at each other with a knowing smile that we were all about to take on a very special challenge.  

I realised when I got on the train that I had forgotten my pre race banana!  Disaster!  I had some nakd bars, but I always have a banana and felt extra nervous - however disaster was averted as a nice lady called Dani was offering a spare banana to another runner so I did a swap for my nakd bar.  We got off the train at Waterloo, followed all the other runners to Waterloo East and hopped on the train to Blackheath after starting to chat to another couple of ladies who were from Ilkley!  

After a busy train journey during which I played a message from Hannah and Alex wishing my luck, we got off at Blackheath and followed the hoards of runners to the start.  Dani was at red start and so she broke off in a different direction, but Abigail was at Blue start with me so we became race friends and negotiated our way around the start area.  We both decided to use the facilities as a first priority and were treated to the bizarre experience that I can't quite explain of the "female urinal".  Now I have used these before, but only at a festival an only after several drinks...sober and with race nerves it's not the best experience and it was a baffling scenario for all concerned!  

The weather was perfect running conditions - i.e. overcast and actually a little bit cold so I popped my hoodie into my red drawstring bag and left on the baggage truck and shivered looked enviously at those runners sensibly in bin bags and old clothes...  note to self to not forget to bring a foil blanket etc in the future! I was well prepped with a camelbak, 15 carb gels, extra vaseline, money, cashcard, oyster card, contact lenses, glasses and earphones!  Abigail and me were nearly in the same starting pen so we stuck together and joined a massive queue for the toilet cubicles.  I ate my banana and had some water and it was about 10.05 by the time we got out of the toilets and we walked over to the starting pens to reach there at 10.10 - official race start time, but it took at least 16 minutes to get over the start line.  Abigail wasn't feeling great about the race so was aiming for 12 minute miles so we swapped numbers and wished each other luck and then I ran off with the crowds feeling fresh on my legs.

The first 3 miles went past in a flash as it did last year and I barely realised I was running - focusing more on dodging my way in front of the slower runners and trying to get some room to focus on a decent pace.   I was aiming for sub 4 hours 30 as that was on my bucket list and so 10 minute miles was my initial plan, however in training I'd managed 20 miles in 3 hours 12 an improvement of 24 minutes from 20 miles last year which had been 3 hours 36.  I had my nike plus switched on and a spotify playlist to keep me going if I needed it, but the atmosphere was immense by itself!

As the red start runners joined up with our green and blue start runners in a massive burst of coincidence I found myself behind Dani who had given me her banana - I wished her well and ran on.  I hit some decent times, but hadn't gone mad on the pace averaging 9 mins 20 per mile - faster than I'd planned, but I felt good so I kept going.

Last year I completely self sabotaged my race by drinking too much and convincing myself that I needed the toilet...3 times!  This time I was stricter trying to sip rather than gulp and also resisting the temptation to take water at each station and not go mad and gulp down the Lucozade sport on offer.  I was sensible with my gels taking one for every 3 miles as I'd practiced during my training runs.  

Up to mile 11 I felt strong and enjoyed the atmosphere, the roar of the crowds, the sound of London accents cheering my name with "go on girl" following it.  I grinned from ear to ear and smiled back at everyone who cheered me and high fived the kids as I ran along.  I ran past a giraffe, T-rex as well as a cool runnings team at this point.  There's always so much to look at and the bands along the way are great too - the noise is overwhelming, but amazing!  

I hit Tower Bridge where I knew my friend Lauren was likely to be - I took out my headphones and looked out, but couldn't see her, but enjoyed soaking up the atmosphere.  Once over tower bridge you shortly hit the point where the mega fast runners are already on the home straight - last year it was a bit tough as I knew how far there was left, but this year I whooped and clapped them on inspired by how fast they were running!

I hit the half way point at 2 hours 2 minutes which until earlier this year would have been a half marathon PB and still felt ok, if a little tired.  At this point  I started to feel like I might need the toilet despite my attempt to discipline my drinking!  Every toilet I ran towards seemed to have a massive queue so I just kept going until in a tunnel at around 25KM there was a fairly short queue.  My app stopped timing at this point and I looked at my watch and counted 3 minutes of toilet and queuing time which in the scheme of things wasn't bad.  I managed to start running again straight away and didn't stop until I'd crossed the finish line!

Running towards Canary Wharf the crowds start to get intense and really loud and it really pushed me along - I'd spotted the SSAFA cheering point on the other side of the "out and back section" so made a point of running close to the crowd so I could get some extra cheers to boost me along!  As I found last year - running London Marathon is emotional for the point that you are running with people with very poignant stories on their backs and messages to loved ones - at several points I'd read a dedication and well up - it's a very strange feeling of being simultaneously elated but melancholic.

The miles between about 18 and 23 are pretty tough as things start to hurt, but I was determined to keep my pace and not walk!  I was really looking forward to the Lucozade tunnel again and at mile 24 it was there!  As I ran into the tunnel "Titanium" by David Guetta was playing and I ran through the tunnel practically dancing punching the air as the beat pounded.  I'm not sure what everyone else thought, but I definitely sped up loads for the last 2 miles and at 5 mins 13 secs per KM it's about as close as I'm ever likely to get to a sprint finish for a marathon!  In fact according to the exciting stats the the marathon provide you with afterwards during my last 7.2KM I was overtaken by 4 people, but I overtook 2014 people!

Usually all my run photos are so dreadful I don't want to even contemplate buying them, but each time I saw a camera this time I felt so triumphant that I held both arms in the air and grinned - so I'm vaguely tempted to part with the extortionate amounts of money to buy one or two photos this year!  They're not all great, but certainly much better than any other race pics!

As I passed all the exciting sights of the Houses of Parliament and onto the Mall I saw the exciting sign of 800m to go!  I'd been checking my time and knew I was on track inside 4.5 hours, by a fairly large margin, but I was determined to run as fast as I could.  I remembered last year the boost I'd got from someone tapping me on the shoulder when I was walking at this point and encouraging me to run so I did the same to a chap who was looking tired - not sure if he appreciated it, but I hope that it helped in some way.

As the finishing line was in sight I remembered that this year to celebrate 35 years of London Marathon they wanted to encourage finishers to finish #handinhand so I grabbed the hand of a lady and ran over the line together triumphantly - again not sure if she appreciated it, but hopefully she did!  I had a feeling that I'd run a good time - around 4 hours 15 maybe, but I wasn't sure due to the toilet stop!

I picked up my medal and goody bag - the t-shirt is much better than last year! And I could see my parents through the fence where we'd agreed to meet - they weren't really paying attention so I used my usual "oi!" so I could pass my stuff over and not have to carry it through the crowds to get to them.  

A facebook messaged popped through from my friend Lauren telling me that she'd seen my time and was impressed that it was 4 hours 9 minutes and 25 seconds - 42 minutes faster than last year!!!  I knew that it felt good running, but I'd never for a minute expected to be that fast and I was completely delighted!

I changed into warmer clothes and then we slowly hobbled out of St James Park and made our way to a Pret a Manager and I ate a sandwich and drank some coconut water.

We took 2 trains and a bus back home and I had some more marathon chat on the way back with a lady who had been with her son and his girlfriend who had run the marathon.  

Again it's a feat of sheer organisation and good will on the part of London that this is such a smooth race.  There are no grumpy volunteers whether they are handing out water or pointing out "humps" at the start of the course.   I saw very few "ill" people and of the 2 I saw they were being well looked after by the numerous medical staff.  Not to forget the supporters who roar and cheer the runners on for literally hours!  

Whilst the supporters on the day are important, the support of my family and friends can't go without comment.  So thank you to my parents for putting me up and looking after me after I finished, Hannah and the boys for the motivational messages and park run junior warm ups and her own inspiring running and finesses challenges, Alex for caving into my relentless Facebook requests for a running buddy and joining me on my last 9 mile long run, my new running friends at Hyde Park Harriers, Jenny for her amazing personal training, Hayley, Sam, Zoe and Tana for their supportive messages,  Emma for her own incredibly inspiring marathon journey, my work colleagues for putting up with my marathon chat for the past 4 months and anyone who has sponsored me and anyone else who I've forgotten as well as to my Grandad who still inspires me and is missed!  A big thank you! 

At home I showered and sunk into the sofa to watch the BBC coverage that my Dad had recorded and enjoyed curry for tea.  I had sore knees, but was elated with my time and still overwhelmed with the amazing atmosphere and experience.  Each year I say - no more marathons...but it's just a little bit addictive and I'm not sure I'm ready to give up yet...at least not this year, I run Marathon Du Medoc in September although I'm not sure my training or time will follow quite the same pattern!  

Oh and the ballot opens again on Monday...